How Can I Improve Self-Talk for Success? Self-talk is your inner-voice or the way how you talk to yourself, whether out loud or silently. Self-talk is a natural process that is practiced by every human being. Positive self-talk can help us flourish; on the other hands, negative self-talk can turn bad situations into worse. Students must understand the power of positive inner-voice and learn ways to improve it.
The mind is essentially a survival machine. Attack and defense against other minds, gathering, storing, and analyzing information – this is what it is good at, but it is not at all creative.
You derive your sense of self from the content and activity of your mind. Because you believe that you would cease to be if you stopped thinking. As you grow up, you form a mental image of who you are, based on your personal and cultural conditioning. We may call this phantom self the ego. It consists of mind activity and can only be kept going through constant thinking.
I think as a society we need to improve our self talk and encourage others to improve their own self talk (especially teens and children). Positive self-talk is an effective stress reduction tool.
If you’re struggling with negative thoughts and want to master self-talk in a very effective way, let go through some best books relevant to the topic.
Table of Contents
Guide Through ”The Power of Now”
This book can be seen as a restatement for our time of that one timeless spiritual teaching, the essence of all religions. It is not derived from external sources, but from the one true Source within, so it contains no theory or speculation.
All quotes are from the book, ”The Power of Now” stated below.
“Your life situation exists in time. life is now. Your life situation is mind-stuff. life is real.””The Power of Now”
That means, our life exists in the present moment, in the NOW. While, our finances, the state of our career, our relationships, these are situations that exist in our mind. Too often, we allow our mind to consume our present moment. And in doing so, we fail to recognize the difference between our thoughts about reality itself.
“Compulsive thinking has become a collective disease.””The Power of Now”
Compulsive thinking is the norm, most of us spend the majority of our time in our heads. Instead of being highly alert and free of thought, both of which are requirements of being in the present moment, we allow our consciousness to bring us into the mental noise that clutters our days. But if we learn to escape the collective disease of compulsive thinking, we can better listen and live in the present.
“Most people don’t know how to listen because the major part of their attention is taken up by thinking.””The Power of Now”
“As long as you are in a state of intense presence, you are free of thought. You are still, yet highly alert. The instant your conscious attention sinks below a certain level, thought rushes in. The mental noise returns; the stillness is lost. You are back in time.””The Power of Now”
”When the mind is running your life, conflict, strife, and problems are inevitable. Being in touch with your inner body creates a clear space of no-mind within which the relationship can flower.””The Power of Now”
Don’t let your mind run your life. If you do, it will be consumed with inner conflict and problems, which will worsen your relationship. Instead, create inner space and stillness to allow your relationship to flourish.
“Somebody says something to you that is rude or designed to hurt. Instead of going into unconscious reaction and negativity, such as attack, defense, or withdrawal, you let it pass right through you. Offer no resistance. It is as if there is nobody there to get hurt anymore. That is forgiveness.””The Power of Now”
If you feel that someone has been rude to you or said something hurtful, try to let the feeling pass through you. Instead of feeling attacked and going on the defensive, try to resist these feelings. When you can do this, and sometimes it takes time, you have truly forgiven the person.
“Without time, no suffering, no negativity, can survive.””The Power of Now”
Suffering and negativity cannot exist in the present moment. They exist in time. They exist in our mind and the stories we tell ourselves about the events that happen in our lives. Time is the medium through which these negative emotions thrive. If you live presently, suffering and negativity will not endure.
Guide Through ”How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”
Worry will make you die early and live an unfulfilled life. Some of the diseases associated with worry include stomach ulcers, heart attacks, strokes, arthritis, high blood pressure, cold, and mental illness.
“Whether in war or peace, the chief difference between good thinking and bad thinking is this: good thinking deals with causes and effects and leads to logical, constructive planning; bad thinking frequently leads to tension and nervous breakdowns.”Dale Carnregie
The three basic steps of problem analysis:
1) Get the facts: Unless you have the facts, you cannot even begin to tackle your problem.
2) Analyze the facts: Find out what the facts say about the problem you are facing.
3) Arrive at a decision and then act on that decision: After analysis, arrive at a decision and commit to it.
When tempted to worry about a problem, write down answers to the following questions:
- What is the problem?
- Secondly, What is the cause of the problem?
- Thirdly, What are all possible solutions?
- Lastly, What is the best solution?
Rules to break the worry habit:
1) Keep busy. When you are busy, you will crowd out the worry in your mind.
2) Don’t fuss about trifles. Don’t permit little things to ruin your life.
3) Use the law of averages to outlaw your worries. Ask yourself: “How likely is it that the thing I’m worried about will happen?”
4) Cooperate with the inevitable. If it is going to happen and you can do nothing about it, accept and move on.
5) Put a “stop-loss” order on your worries. Decide whether the thing giving you anxiety deserves that much attention or not.
6) Let the past bury its dead. Don’t dwell on the past.
Seven Ways To Cultivate A Great Mental Attitude that will bring you peace and happiness:
1) Fill your mind with the right thoughts. The outcome of your life is a reflection of your thoughts.
2) Never try to get even with your enemies. When you try to get even with your enemies, you hurt more than them.
3) Don’t worry about ingratitude. Expect it. The only way to find happiness is through the joy of giving.
4) Count your blessings, not your troubles. Be grateful for what you have.
5) Do not imitate others. Be yourself.
6) When fate hands you a lemon, make a lemonade. Make the best out of every situation.
7) Forget your unhappiness by creating happiness for others. When you are good to others, you are also being good to yourself.
Guide Through ” The Power Of Positive Thinking ”
The Power Of Positive Thinking shows that the roots of success lie in the mind and teaches us how to believe in ourselves, break the habit of worrying, and take control of our lives by taking control of our thoughts and changing our attitude.
Here are 3 lessons to help you think more positively:
1) Start with confidence and watch your problems shrink. confidence is important, because if you feel inferior, you’ll act inferior.
2) Your world is nothing more than the thoughts you have about your experiences.
Of course all the problems in your life are real. And yes, some of them might take a few years to solve, like debt, or a serious illness. But how you react to those problems is entirely up to you. You might not be able to solve those problems at the push of a button, but your attitude is something you can change from one second to the next.
3) In order to live worry-free, first imagine a worry-free life. Just imagining that it is possible for you to live without worry will take a lot of your current worries away.
Guide Through ”What to Say When You Talk to Yourself”
Negative programming prevents individuals from becoming and doing exactly what they want.
“YOU ARE EVERYTHING THAT IS, YOUR THOUGHTS, YOUR LIFE, YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE. SO, YOU ARE EVERYTHING YOU CHOOSE TO BE. YOU ARE AS UNLIMITED AS THE ENDLESS UNIVERSE.””What to Say When You Talk to Your Self”
We should know how to treat out brain, if we treat our brain in a right way and carefully by giving our brain right direction then our brain will for sure do right things, our brain will work for us in a right way.
The three main take away from the book are:
1) Negative thoughts can distort your self-image.
2) Try listening to pre-recorded self-talk messages.
3) Unlike other methods for self-improvement, self-talk is permanent and can scale.
Final Thoughts to Improve Self Talk
Remind yourself every day of all the assets that you’ve got. The practice of counting your blessing and talking it to yourself brings a sense of completeness and joy.
Seek your inner self and utter the most adorable things about yourself. Remember, if you will not appreciate yourself, there is very little that anyone can do to help you cheer up.
Find your Why
Stop telling yourself that you failed because you are not good enough. Start telling yourself why you failed and how do you plan to do better the next time.
Hope It Helps!